Please, Call my name

In my bedroom on a gray November morning, sitting in bed - wondering who I am, why I'm here, what I should do with myself.  I'm told this is normal.  I wonder how many people get to this point in there life ... when everything seems to blow away like smoke and they're left to reshape a new life.  Do some just float through life without going this deep? Does it happen when you're twenty? Thirty? Forty? Fifty?

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I know where I want to go, I just don't know how to get there. God, please call my name.  Please tell me how precious I am to you.  Please set my feet on your path and give me a home.  Give me a purpose to make a difference to spread your name.  I know where I want to go.  I can see it in my mind's eye - but the picture from reality is fuzzy.  I need your help to make it clear.  I need your hand, your power, I need You, Jesus. I cannot do this alone.

So I'll sit and wait. And pray that in my waiting I'm not washed away by the waves or hardened in my heart by the pain.  I'll pray that my heart remains soft and tender and ever waiting like a bride.  Your bride.

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When I was young you set these things into motion and put dreams into my little heart.  Dreams to bring distant peoples into harmony and love with you, to live with them and eat with them, to cry with them and grow.  Father, I am completely dependent upon you - so weak and vulnerable I could be squashed like a bug.  I can do nothing to help myself, I have not the strength to help myself.  Be near.  Be so near.  Do not let my tears flow for naught.  Return the smiles to my soul in abundance and leave me not. Take my dreams and give them life. Take my heart and make it beautiful, make it pure, make it yours.  In the meantime,  I am here. Your little girl.
Source: youtube.com via Nora on Pinterest