Lost: 1 Surname

I think I lost my last name...but I'm sure not when.  I noticed the other day that it was missing; someone said it, and it took me a bit to realize it was mine.  I was glad to have it back, of course, I hadn't seen it in a while.  But no one ever says my last name.  I'm not sure why, its not difficult, "Feltman" - but I'm not Shasta "Feltman" anymore, no one calls me this - I'm just "Shasta".  I don't mind, its just a peculiar observation.

Its a bit strange - to lose your last name - and when I finally heard it again, it sounded so foreign.  Its almost like you don't belong to anyone - you belong to the world.  I wonder if God knows my last name. Well, I know He does, but he never uses it, He calls me "Shasta" too.

My mom lost our last name too.  She's a "Lebrecht" now.  Its just my brothers and me. I guess I'm the "Feltman" leader now since my dad passed and we never see the other "Feltman"s.  But I don't think I'm a good leader if I keep losing it.

I wonder what its like for those who don't lose their last names? They always know that they're a "Johnson" or a "Larson".  "Hello, I'm a Blatchley" (sorry, Chris) "Oh, I know your mom." 

So I guess I'm just "Shasta".  That's okay, I really do like my name.  But without a last name its difficult to remember your past, your family, heredity - form your identity - like one half of you is missing.  Like losing your father - one half of you is missing.  Good thing God knows it - I should talk to him.